missing oliver already

Painting vegetables

I have this new hobby -- painting vegetables and fruit. Here's a few of the recent beauties.

rainbow chard

radishes

still life with pear and other fruit

a case of the madeleines...

Mel told me about how Proust writes about this...."episode of the madeleine" this morning. I was making "detox" yogi tea, and told Mel it reminded me of my semester in Washington DC over ten years ago.  I drank this particular tea almost everyday then.  Memories flashed back involuntarily of running the "mall" to Lincoln Memorial and back to our little apartment near this bookstore where I bought the complete works of Oscar Wilde.  I remember feeling very determined as well as very out of place. I kept thinking, as I was in these political meetings and conversations, "I get all the news I need on the weather report."  Quoting Simon and Garfunkel certainly wasn't the best way to mesh with DC society, and so I floundered a lot.


On the Washington Mall with
Margot, a teacher who gave me "The Art of Kissing,"
Bethany the Writer,
a friend who introduced me to Ethiopian Food in Adams Morgan,
and Melody, who I liked a lot.


Anyways, I love madeleines, I love the name madeleine (and madison. The two names of my car.), and I'm thankful for this morning's episode.

An update newsletter

I recently heard that I should have sent out a little holiday update, so I came up with this Chinese New Year newsletter.

Dear Friends,

With the coming new year of the rabbit Wednesday, I decided it was time to write a little review of my life and send it out my amigas. I hear 2011 will be a year of stronger and more intimate relationships for me as a sheep (in the Chinese zodiac). Already, in the past few years, my relationships have been more trusting and nurturing. I’m incredibly grateful for my friends, allies, sisters, and family, and here’s my brief sum up of mid 2009 to now:

Let’s see – In late summer 2009, my dog Oliver and I moved out of Highland Park (LA), took time to travel in New Mexico and Baja, and then moved into an organic vegetable farm in Ventura County (VC). At the same time, I decided to take a break from teaching English at CSU, Long Beach and began my studies in Women’s Spirituality at the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Fran.

Winter at the Farm with Oliver

It was a big move, but the year at the farm helped me integrate my academic or heady studies into my heart and body. I lived “intentionally” with four amazing women, and together we worked with the Earth to develop a community focused on sustainability and integrity.


My studies let me explore so many interesting subjects including women’s ways of “knowing” as well as my mestiza and pinay (Filipina) roots. In my spare time, I took flight lessons (a life goal of mine), studied native plants, connected with other labyrinth loving women in VC, became a part of the art and sweat lodge culture around the farm, and joined a hula dancing group led by some fellow salseras.

Our Farm (and me) in the Ventura County Star

Although we as a farm community ventured out of the area a few times (up to Yosemite, out to Ojai, and down to LA), I spent most of the year settled in at the farm house. Thankfully, so many friends (from Berkeley to Switzerland) came to visit and joined in with our farm life (and farm parties!).


As summer 2010 approached, I decided to dive more into my PhD adventure and leave our community. The farm had been such a stable place, and I knew the transition would be challenging and that I would miss my sisterfriends at the farm.

Nevertheless, this past Autumn has been full of “good things” as I travel between the Bay area for school and the L.A. area for family. Both my grandfather and mother have been sick, and although this has been difficult, there have also been some beautiful moments. Also, I’m pleased to announce that I continue to enjoy my studies, and I will be presenting a paper on “Mestiza Spirituality and Embodied Restlessness” at the American Academy of Religion Conference in Whittier (my hometown!) in March.

In between family and school time, I continue to dance salsa and I’ve taken up danza Azteca and other rich forms of dancing with my friends. I’ve also had the honor to share stories and live with a few old friends in the Bay and LA area I hadn’t seen in a long while (some for 8 years or so!).

Next week, I’m traveling North again to work on my PhD. I will stop at the farm, and then I will be in SF taking a new semester of classes. I’m so grateful for the opportunity to be what I love: a traveler, a learner, and hopefully, a healer.

Reflecting on all of my life adventures thus far (I’m thinking of undergrad, Europe, Asia, and Oz too) is such a gift with endearing friends like you! Thank you for being a reflection, an adviser, a mentor, and a part of my chosen (extended) familia.

Oliver and I send you love, joy, and transformation this coming year! - Cristy Rose

Fermentation

I've been making water kefir. A friend gave me a starter in Oakland a month or so ago, and ta da! 

also found this cool blog that describes the goodness of water kefir.....
http://enzymo.wordpress.com/
They write:
Water Kefir Grains, also known as Sugar Kefir Grains, Tibicos, Tibi, Japanese Water Crystals, Ginger Beer Plant or California Bees, are a culture of bacteria and yeast held in a polysaccharide matrix created by the bacteria. The microbes present in Water Kefir Grains exist in a symbiotic relationship thus maintaining an incredibly stable culture. The friendly microbes feed off the sugar in the sugar water solution, producing lactic acid, alcohol (ethanol), and carbon dioxide gas which carbonates the drink.Water kefir is a fantastic non-dairy alternative to milk kefir with PROBIOTICS and ENZYMES !!

burlesque in my 30s

took my first burlesque class finally. i've been talking

about it for a while. it seems like a healthy hobby for my 30s.

the website told me to bring heels (i brought my salsa shoes pictured above),

comfy clothes, lipstick, and attitude.

i'm hoping to convince some womyn to come out with me because it was

such a liberating and fun time.

a creatrix, a wall, a room of my own

My mom's been sick lately...

My mom's been sick, and I recently thought through the things I like or I will miss when she passes:

Your cooking…breakfast in the morning eggs or pancakes or oatmeal.


Your laugh…big, uncontrollable.

Your love of old movies and movies we watched as kids…arsenic and old lace, home alone, etc.

Your creativity…the art supplies packed up in the garage that indicate art can be created anytime.

Your love for Oliver…your grandpuppy.

Laying in bed with you watching tv.

Your magazines…Martha, better homes…

Your garden

Your search for a cultural identity you can be proud of.

Your visits to the places and cities and countries I was living in…

That's my mom on the left

Trying to remember who i am....

It's a start.

I am los angeles.

I am frosted flakes in the morning.

I am he-man and she-ra

I am rainbow bright.

I am Disneyland.

I am the mall down the street.

I am the starbucks on every corner when I need it.
I am family arguments on Sunday morning.

I am chubby little Filipina Spanish something girl.

I am anorexic for God.

I am mom, come out of your room.

I am husband, don’t jump.

I am dad, don’t tell me what to do.

I am homecoming court.

I am straight A student.

I am creatrix.
I am dance.

I am red.

I am anger and vulnerability.

I am fierce and shameless.

Art for a friend

I've been enjoying the creative process and found this artwork quite cathartic.

Blessings

I take my grandparents to mass. But, I’m not Catholic, so I can’t receive communion. I was baptized as a baby, but never made those first and holy communions, so this means I’m excluded from the body and blood. However, I can go up to the front and receive a blessing. And, I like this...alot.

Usually, it’s from a lay woman like myself, and I like that too. I like that they are women. Some will say, “Blessings on you,” and some pause not knowing what to say; I think they must not get folks wanting blessings often.

Nevertheless, I love it. It seems so real to me. A stranger’s hand on my forehead, her words spoken to the world as an offering of what might come my way, and me eager to receive.

Here’s how it goes. As I approach the front, I cross my arms over my chest. This cues the giver to put away the wafer and to extend her hand out to me directly. I bow my head slightly to make my forehead more accessible, and that’s that. The music’s playing, the people are shuffling, and I’m waiting to hear the words I’m meant to receive. After the blessings, I pass by the wine too and make my way to my seat.

I think I will start collecting and recording the blessings!

Womanifesto

for 2011


Self-love and forgiveness. Regardless. Dance. Dancing. Community. Trust and intimacy. Welcome shadow self both angry and vulnerable. No and yes. Creatrix. Art. True and real. Seeking nurturing. Leaving drama. Transforming. Recognizing moments. Letting go. All is well. It is safe for me to be myself. I love myself.