tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-68495092542123300982024-03-13T10:29:48.230-07:00cristy rose hipswords -- liminality --
whimsydra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.comBlogger416125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-71805096144635250662019-06-25T20:44:00.001-07:002019-06-25T20:44:51.468-07:00Moments of ControlToday was one of those days when you, as a parent, are presented with this choice: hold your child down, control that child's body, because you believe it is necessary -- or walk away.<br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/--kclvn7Z8p0/XRLnnruF8II/AAAAAAABVFU/muuL61lfgLoAM7rRGtEASX3suXjObr53gCLcBGAs/s1600/paris24.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/--kclvn7Z8p0/XRLnnruF8II/AAAAAAABVFU/muuL61lfgLoAM7rRGtEASX3suXjObr53gCLcBGAs/s320/paris24.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
I remember having this choice when my little one was an infant, maybe a toddler, and we needed him to be securely in his carseat. I remember having to hold him down while my partner buckled him in.<br />
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Today, a couple years later, this child is nearly 4. And, once again, we are in this situation. I am in this situation. This time, it's about vaccines. <br />
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I want to give myself some grace; the last few vaccine sessions went smoothly. Our little one wasn't <i>happy </i>about the shot, but he went along with it. I sensed he understood it was mandatory for him to go to "his school," the school he loves immensely, where he knows his friends are, where he loves the songs and games and toys and snacks.</div>
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This time, was different. Perhaps it was nap time, perhaps it is his age, perhaps it is that we are going through a huge time of transition: dadda is gone to work in Alaska and we have no home presently.</div>
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Whatever the reason, my child ends up yelling at me that he does not want the shot and he backs away terrified. Honestly, I want to post a pic of what his face and body look like at this moment -- oh, lorde, how awful -- and a pic of mine -- lorde have mercy, but I just can't. Up until this moment, that face and those words never existed in our family's world. </div>
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I imagine, though, it's a meme like this:</div>
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<img alt="sad comfort eating GIF" src="https://media2.giphy.com/media/iaRxbSsPQV2IU/giphy.webp?cid=790b76115d12e9a46633505a6f673a6c&rid=giphy.webp" /></div>
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BUT NOT FUNNY AT ALL.<br />
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So, 30 minutes into this terribly traumatic doctor's visits, and I am finally holding my child in my lap while the nurse holds his legs, and another nurse pops in and says, "What if we reschedule?"<br />
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And, I say, "yes."dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-76972210218721570012019-03-03T09:00:00.000-08:002019-03-03T09:02:37.985-08:00A Letter of Interest<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-f_tR3fmwM4M/XHwIGAKLnfI/AAAAAAABUtA/pCVxTuuBMUIMBJucMzphz4q8lPAJj4_IgCLcBGAs/s1600/horoscope.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="453" data-original-width="604" height="240" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-f_tR3fmwM4M/XHwIGAKLnfI/AAAAAAABUtA/pCVxTuuBMUIMBJucMzphz4q8lPAJj4_IgCLcBGAs/s320/horoscope.jpg" width="320" /></a>Interest: I am the granddaughter of Priscilla of New Mexico and Concepcion of Cebu. I am the mother of Jaguar of Long Beach. I am an artist and a thinker. I am a reader. I am a survivor. I teach Gender Studies part time at the University. I choose to teach part time so that I can be a full time mother. I am 40 years old this year. I live, sometimes, above the poverty line, and I want you to know that I consider this thriving not just surviving. I am my ancestors’ wildest dream as a mother and a professor. I get to spend time with my child. I write because I cannot help myself. I write to process my day’s work and to affirm my family and home culture. I collaborate whenever I can. I co-founded a podcast called Las Doctoras. I am co-authoring a book called Semillas de las Abuelas. I am co-facilitating a workshop for mothers and daughters on first menstruation. I aim to work only 30 hours a week. I try to not buy new things but to reuse and reduce and recycle. I have to put my hands in the Earth every day. I like to have frijoles de la olla on the stove. I had them cooking while I gave birth at home. My comfort food. I believe children are magic; I create space to witness and affirm my child’s magic. </div>
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Person: A medium once told me my heart told her that I am more eccentric than I let on. As a Virgo, I dress simply. I speak with intention. I control my environment as much as I can. As a survivor of trauma, I live simply. I cultivate spaces of clarity and safety. I hate the TV. I listen to when I feel uncomfortable and when I do not know how I feel. I organize. I meditate. As a traveler, I love packing up my duffle bag backpack for the next adventure. Airports are among my favorite places. I pass as a local in many countries. I learn the local dances. I paint what I see. I write what I experience as a woman of color. </div>
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Artist: In the morning, my child and I wake, and together we make art: writing and painting. I have a water-color station for us set up in our home to pull us into this art time. I am working on an oracle deck for children as a part of Semillas de las Abuelas. The cards of the deck contain poems and paintings. Each morning, I work on one of these cards. Community/ Comunidad. Earth/Tierra. Share/Compartir. In the afternoon, while my child naps, I work on my manuscript Becoming a Woman of Color: A Travel Memoir. I read from my work-in-progress at a reading in San Francisco for Weekday Wanderlust facilitated by Don George of Lonely Planet and my travel/memoir writing teacher from VONA (Voices of Our Nations Arts Foundation), Faith Adiele. I submit this piece for this application. </div>
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Artist-Parent: I compelled to integrate mothering into my artwork. I want my motherhood to change my life as a person and as an artist. I believe that this union will bring greater gifts than I can even imagine. I understand that the messages I receive in dominant sources of media suggest otherwise, and I choose to listen to the messages of my ancestors. These messages reveal to me that my mother-child relationship is key to art and life and more. And, at the same time, the balance can be challenging to create. There is little model. I require time alone in my artistic process. I require moments to reflect in meditation which my child can only participate in in short bursts. Thus, my ideal balance is to create moments of play and paint and lying on the ground and laughing as well as moments of observing my world and my creative work and writing in the early morning hours. This is my calling and daily practice. </div>
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Interest: This award would permit me to write, to have the time to write, to have the means to write, the room to write. Currently, I write in the bathroom or in the car recording notes on my phone or while my child naps. I write, and, at the same time, I long for space and time to cultivate my art. I long for the monetary energy to take space to write, create, breathe, and be present to the thoughts and stories in me. This award would be pivotal in my creative work.</div>
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-80380380233326416242018-11-08T11:38:00.001-08:002018-11-08T11:38:47.620-08:00Finding a Community: Las Doctoras and Latina Mothers CollaborativeIt's hard to believe that a year has gone by since I joined the <a href="https://www.latinamotherscollaborative.com/" target="_blank">Latina Mothers Collaborative</a> (LMC). Invited by my dear friend <a href="https://www.instagram.com/carolina_adame/?hl=en" target="_blank">Carolina Adame</a>, which I know from our Spanish-based unschoooling group La Manada. In my first meeting with LMC, I found in this intimate group of muxeres like minded friends. One of these muxers, <a href="http://dra-reneelemus.com/" target="_blank">Dr. Renee Lemus</a>, I knew before the collaborative; our children attended <a href="https://www.maplevillageschool.org/" target="_blank">Maple Village</a> together. We had talked at length, watching our children play unstructured and safe, about our doctorates, our gender and ethnic studies classes, and our identities as latinas. I found a sister this year for sure. And together, we are embarking on a dream journey: <a href="https://lasdoctoras.teachable.com/admin/courses/414124/curriculum" target="_blank">Las Doctoras</a>, an online class outside the university with our social media presence on IG as <a href="https://www.instagram.com/las.doctoras/" target="_blank">@las.doctoras </a> We are even working on Las Doctoras, a podcast to explore the topics at hand. Really there is so much to be grateful for this season of holidays and joy.<br />
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<br />dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-56116902120098453032018-11-02T14:38:00.001-07:002018-11-02T14:42:41.401-07:00A Sense of Freedom<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes you just want to get out. Out of the daily grind. Out of the mother’s circles. Out of the weekly commitments. Out of whatever routine you’ve developed for yourself. Yourself, that is, and your family. Sometimes you just want to get out of the family life that is now your life. This life may be some of choosing; however, at the end of the day, this life feels like it has been chosen for you. I mean: do you really want two cars and a commute to work and a closet full of clothes that you continually have to give away and get new ones? Do you really want to read books on parenting and simplicity and consciousness, and do you really want to have late fines from the library and a calendar starting to brim with holiday plans for the next few months? All these things could be so normal and so beautiful, but sometimes don’t you just want to be free of it all? And not just sometimes but all the time?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: times new roman; white-space: pre-wrap;">Perhaps it’s how I hold it? How I hold these life doings. Too heavy.
Too significant. Perhaps it is how my parents held them?
How I saw them carried out in my family? How my parents saw my grandparents carry on with life.</span></div>
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Freedom</span></h2>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">This sculpture is about the struggle for achievement of freedom through the creative process. <em style="color: #5c5c5c; font-family: "droid sans"; word-wrap: break-word;">Zenos Frudakis</em></span></h2>
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-91809832786808856012017-12-31T01:12:00.003-08:002018-11-08T11:46:31.498-08:00A Newsletter<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: right;">
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<a href="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/VOezACVCM7YpXQ56tHTC_OIFinud1BjxREV-b-XXkUY9czAC3b4rumPbq3CVHNgoJrXPeUOYH_bbYurQ47qVqQ3WHxFVSc_fHGJijU1fvttvYOFADNDuLNs8PcEkb49-sq4u8enT" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="194" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/VOezACVCM7YpXQ56tHTC_OIFinud1BjxREV-b-XXkUY9czAC3b4rumPbq3CVHNgoJrXPeUOYH_bbYurQ47qVqQ3WHxFVSc_fHGJijU1fvttvYOFADNDuLNs8PcEkb49-sq4u8enT" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="195" /></a>Summer 2018 Newsletter: EASE AND JOY<br />
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Family,<br />
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Mid June, and I am finally writing our annual newsletter. Bebe is playing, I am teaching a couple Gender Studies courses online with CSUDH, and Zack, after finishing his semester at CSULB, is off to Alaska to fish for Salmon. <br />
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<a href="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/MN6bHcSBn5InudRadibkdxGThnl86tmeySYhfE-9ND_Lkf5gGSmUFYMuQniAv5g4LrhsaFU06INrzpovXK1JN-37AVnHbmRdOO_cFxQhDTbUiN_LIniXPkR0EGslQ2QjiZzlZcd5" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/MN6bHcSBn5InudRadibkdxGThnl86tmeySYhfE-9ND_Lkf5gGSmUFYMuQniAv5g4LrhsaFU06INrzpovXK1JN-37AVnHbmRdOO_cFxQhDTbUiN_LIniXPkR0EGslQ2QjiZzlZcd5" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="160" /></a><b style="clear: left; float: left; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /><img height="146" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/9EVoaiPUSJ0Pfq1LD56jMVruXB1JBHn7RJkDdF7gMLBqNY5CPJoOOokgYo54ID2WgkXK6vP7xz_SCr5jOSMYdOpQdYMAUF7v2ArKunFOA9hk47yMhhEBiwnnwaX_Q060K26zNWuD" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="200" /></b>Our summertime intentions include: ease and joy and rest and...writing. So let me begin with writing you all a little note about what’s been happening in our lives. These are the late spring/ summer days of Little Robinbird and Abuelo Oliverdog with Dada and Mama, in the style that Mama shares at bedtime with “Bebe”: Once upon a time, in the beach loft on the Peninsula in Long Beach, Little Robinbird and Abuelo Oliverdog woke up and usually found that the sky was blue, the sun was out, and the ocean was calling. Robinbird would stretch and say, “Good morning, Mama and Dada” and “Hi, Oliver” or just tell us a story about how a snake bit him but then a bird carried the snake away; Mama, inspired by one of Robinbird’s books, might say to Robinbird “Your eyes are the ocean, your skin the golden Earth, your smile the sun, your laughter the playful wind.” Then, the little family would climb downstairs for coffee. Oliverdog would follow with a slow but steady hop down as well, and each would say ‘mornnin’ to the family whose photographs decorated the stairwell wall. (Abuela Grammie passed this year, and she has an honored place there). Robinbird would help Mama make breakfast and water the ‘babies’: the little peas and cilantro and malunggay growing on the porch. Sometimes, if Mama was very lucky, while Robinbird pretend played, Mama took a moment to journal at her “sit spot.” Soon, Oliverdog would ask (by scratching at the door) for a walk, and so began outdoor time walking or bicycling around the boardwalk. Art or music indoor time followed, and after lunch would be naptime. On the walls of their room, you’d find Mama’s artwork, Dada’s octopus ink print from our Alaska travels last summer, and a painting of the ocean that Mama and Robinbird created this year. Later afternoon brought beachtime with friends or an adventure to the museum or aquarium or Disneyland. Altogether, it was a pretty wonderful summer for “Team Sea Jaguar,” but for Dada being in Alaska. Mama was so grateful for her Little Robinbird and Abuelo Oliver. Fin.<br />
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And, that is our lovely little life. Last summer, we traveled to Hawaii and the Northwest. This summer, we have a Caribbean cruise and the Colorado Plateau. We hope to see you all very soon. Bebe can show you his grito he’s working on, and we'll all shout “I am proud to be your family!” - Mama Cristina<br />
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-50609612241841390072017-01-15T10:00:00.001-08:002018-11-08T11:48:05.616-08:00Diwang Pinay<br />
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Last evening, I spent at the Uptown Business Center in North Long Beach with mujeres from Gabriela, a Filipina led organization that advocates for gender issues.<br />
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Together, we read true stories of the lived realities of Filipina migrant women who have been manipulated, trafficked, into the US. Told lies, brought into great debt, and coming from a great need to provide for their families, these Pinays somehow survive. The story we read aloud last night from the account of an Ate C struck home with me. It's a story of abuse that is not unlike the story of my Lola. Although nearly 80 years has passed since Lola came to the US as a War Bride following WWII, these Pinays continue to experience abusive relationships tied in with desparate hopes for the American Dream or Nightmare if you will. For my Lola, this was surviving in a relationship to a violent white (in every sense of the word) husband (my grandfather) in Missouri and then California, and for the Ate whose story I read last night, surviving in the hell of under valued caretaking of white elders in Arizona. <br />
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<i>I had to risk it. </i><br />
<i> -- not enough for my family.</i><br />
<i>They were selling us.</i><br />
<i>-- I told my children I was ok.</i><br />
<i>They listened to my conversations and told me not complain.</i><br />
<i>-- money for education, money for food.</i><br />
<i>I knew I was in trouble. </i><br />
<i>-- (crying)</i><br />
<i>I borrowed money to pay for training, the passage, the visa.</i><br />
<i>-- my god. </i><br />
<i>There was a naked old man on the couch.</i><br />
<i>-- trembling.</i><br />
<i>I arrived in Phoenix and waited for over 8 hours. </i><br />
<i>-- my god. </i><br />
<i>I had to risk it. </i><br />
<i>-- my friends drove out from San Diego with their grandkids in the middle of the night. </i><br />
<i>Just me a three elderly people to take care of. 5 hours of sleep a night.</i><br />
<i>-- my god. </i><br />
<i>I had to risk it. </i><br />
<i>-- I called my friends. </i><br />
<i>I told my children I was ok. </i><br />
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<i><br /></i>dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-59103674701977562062017-01-13T17:12:00.004-08:002017-01-13T17:12:57.345-08:00Challenges...and essay challenge 2017Took on a challenge to write weekly, and here it is January 12, and I've not written a thing. Today, I finally took a moment in the chaos of motherhood to, at least, begin:<br />
Here's my inspiration:<br />
<br />
from “In the Subjunctive Mood” by Michelle Morano:<br />
<br />
IN language, as in life, moods are complicated, but at least in language there are only two. The indicative mood is for knowledge, facts, absolutes, for describing what’s real or definite. You’d use the indicative to say, for example: <br />
I was in love. <br />
Or, The man I loved tried to kill himself. <br />
Or, I moved to Spain because the man I loved, the man who tried to kill himself, was driving me insane. <br />
The indicative helps you tell what happened or is happening or will happen in the future (when you believe you know for sure what the future will bring). <br />
The subjunctive mood, on the other hand, is uncertain. It helps you tell what could have been or might be or what you want but may not get. You’d use the subjunctive to say:<br />
I thought he’d improve without me. <br />
Or, I left so that he’d begin to take care of himself. <br />
Or later, after your perspective has been altered, by time and distance and a couple of cervezas in a brightly lit bar, you might say: <br />
I deserted him (indicative).<br />
I left him alone with his crazy self for a year (indicative).<br />
Because I hoped (after which begins the subjunctive) that being apart might allow us to come together again.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Indicative mood and facts -- for example:<br />
I am a mother.<br />
Or, my child is giving the dog his pacifier.<br />
Or, the light is coming through the window on the couch so perfectly just now; I can see the waves glisten too.<br />
Or, I need a nap because I am a mother and my child is sharing his pacifier with the dog and the couch is so perfect for a nap just now.<br />
<br />
Subjunctive mood and uncertainty -- for example:<br />
I thought we could lay down together and take a nap.<br />
Or, I am waiting for my partner to get home so I might nap.<br />
<br />
Later, after my perspective is altered -- if I ever get a drink -- I could say:<br />
I’ve been up all night nursing a sick and teething baby.<br />
I will be starting the semester teaching in a couple weeks.<br />
Because I am swamped with sleeplessness and teaching prep I hoped that my child would nap with me in the sun.<br />
<br />
<br class="Apple-interchange-newline" />dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-85451704388309021982016-11-28T10:37:00.000-08:002016-11-28T10:38:37.274-08:00(Re)connecting and Oshun Hard to believe a year has passed since I last posted on this blog. I had hoped to turn it into a website -- but it's hard to choose the right formatting. I think I keep hoping Google will develop a website and that my blogger posts will easily transition into that system. Alas, hasn't happened yet. <br />
<br />
Too, I'm now the mama of a 14 month old, so writing (especially when the computer is down) is somewhat challenging. It gets put in the final stack of "to dos." <br />
<br />
I have been able to journal and record bebe's growth and my own, and I've found time in the mornings to paint and be in quite meditative creation space. Thank goodness. Still, writing -- I find this writing just now delightful - a breath of fresh air -- powerful -- soothing. <br />
<br />
This soothing is what I've been experiencing lately as I think upon my African ancestry and its influence on the curanderismo I carry. <br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a data-ved="0ahUKEwib3Irli8zQAhWqilQKHbiGBpoQjRwIBw" href="https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&frm=1&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwib3Irli8zQAhWqilQKHbiGBpoQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.pinterest.com%2Fpin%2F371406300490557280%2F&bvm=bv.139782543,d.cGw&psig=AFQjCNE9PsyzQtRTmzj45szJ5J6xrNXR4g&ust=1480444516995214" id="irc_mil" jsaction="mousedown:irc.rl;keydown:irc.rlk;irc.il;" style="border: 0px currentColor; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Image result for oshun art" height="398" id="irc_mi" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/6a/67/20/6a67204ec342fbba53925c3b4faf2bce.jpg" style="margin-top: 125px;" width="236" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oshun -- artist unknown</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-13652058305731789672016-01-11T15:49:00.000-08:002016-01-11T16:01:22.184-08:00Annual Newsletter<div style="border-image: none;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-B6-3AhPCOGs/VpRBRuDEtlI/AAAAAAABPQk/iGOqOh7g5Io/s1600/11009092_10153320657100622_1112933912215139618_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-B6-3AhPCOGs/VpRBRuDEtlI/AAAAAAABPQk/iGOqOh7g5Io/s200/11009092_10153320657100622_1112933912215139618_n.jpg" width="200" /></a>When I think about writing an annual newsletter for 2015, I know it’d be easy to just say 2015 was THE YEAR OF THE BABY. Pregnancy confirmed January 20, 2015 (first day of my women’s studies class Spring Semester at CSUDH), and baby birthed September 23, 2015 (at home on Autumnal Equinox). But, you know there’s so much more that happened as our Robin Sea Jaguar was developing in my womb. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-S2HDQvxxRYo/VpRBgv-Eu8I/AAAAAAABPQw/4ex7aIFABXc/s1600/10734217_10204957246713029_4177436342363957541_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-S2HDQvxxRYo/VpRBgv-Eu8I/AAAAAAABPQw/4ex7aIFABXc/s200/10734217_10204957246713029_4177436342363957541_n.jpg" width="200" /></a><br />To begin, we made a few trips out to the Channel Islands with our sailing vessel “Abundance” and a couple great friends. We went diving for lobster, and the sea gifted me with an abalone shell. And, swimming through the great kelp forests out there was comparable to my times diving in Hawaii. Seriously, it was amazing, and I am so grateful for our sailboat and these priceless trips to places that are so close but so far for most us from So Cal. We kept our boat in Ventura, and although the commute from DH to Ventura wasn’t ideal, the boat life was worth it. <br /><br />Some achievements of the year: I celebrated my first mother’s day as a mother ever. I was also invited to speak at the Association for the Study of Women & Mythology as well as the National Association for Chicana and Chicano Studies. Then, I had my first academic publication in the Gloria Anzaldua “El Mundo Zurdo” anthology. And, some of my pieces from “Sacred Heart of Mango” were chosen for publication in JOTA. Finally, I began work on a new art series on pregnancy; my “Anak Talong” is above. It felt good and still does to be an academic as well as a mama. </div>
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Throughout the year, we were honored with a handful of wonderful baby showers hosted by family and friends from the Bay Area to the LA Area. There’s so much love in our community for this #beberawr as I call him, and I certainly felt it as we celebrated the baby yet to be born in Huasna, in Whittier, in Ojai, and more. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="border-image: none;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--mjPYEeknpc/VpRB9AVyGzI/AAAAAAABPQ4/x-I7_Z1Kx04/s1600/holiday%2Bjoy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--mjPYEeknpc/VpRB9AVyGzI/AAAAAAABPQ4/x-I7_Z1Kx04/s320/holiday%2Bjoy.jpg" width="240" /></a>Although we sold the boat in May and moved into our new place on the Peninsula in Long Beach in August, I enjoyed a great “summer of pregnancy” while Z was in Alaska fishing. I stayed at the family home in Whittier swimming and yoga-ing as well as seeing the chiropractor, acupuncturist, massage therapist, and psychologist (I have great health insurance through DH). I think it all culminated in my 36th birthday, which I spent at Glen Ivy (my first time going there ever). <br /><br /> As you can imagine, the year peaked with the birth of baby binhi (“seed” in Tagalog), which went so well thanks to our birth team. If you are interested in the birth story, I can send it to you. We got to bring baby out to visit his ancestors in San Gabriel and Santa Maria in November, and then, of course the holidays were precious with a baby. <br /><br />Loads of wintry love,<br /><br />Me and the Rose-Hawkins Family </div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-50764886911058097052015-07-03T10:35:00.002-07:002015-07-03T10:35:56.790-07:00Seeking...Inspiration<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">And, I have a new
writing station at my friend Delia’s little cottage in Whittier. I’m here for my
third time as I try to cultivate memoir writing space, picking up from where I
left off last summer after VONA (Voices of Our Nation’s Art Foundation). VONA is meeting again this summer in Miami,
and I elected to stay in So Cal in prep for the baby’s arrival in
September. Indeed, I let go of going to
Anzaldua (a conference I was to present at) as well as MALCS in order to
focus. It feels good overall, but I do really
want to pick up again <i>Becoming a Woman of
Color: A Travel Memoir. </i><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I’ve got a lot to
pull from: my travels of the last 16 years or so (which I began to process and
write on while at VONA), our life of a sailboat, and now, my maternity. The issue at hand, as is the case normally,
is believing that I have something to say, believing that my story matters, and
letting this true voice and story of mine come out. I do have the good news that my first academic paper has been published by <a href="http://auntlute.com/7334/new_release/el-mundo-zurdo-4-2/" target="_blank">El Mundo Zurdo and Aunt Lute Press</a>. So, there's that.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Still, the need for a writing place outside
where I live, thus the need for space to reflect in gratitude, thus the need
for some inspiration. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Inspiration: it’s
time to look again at those VONA notes. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I have been
writing poetry about becoming a mother as well as creating daily paintings on
the subject too. These are
accomplishments as are my established routines of these past three weeks:
prenatal yoga, morning walks with friends, gym squats and arm exercises,
swimming laps and helping Oliver get used to the pool (hopefully), acupuncture
and chiropractor visits, playing lullabies for the baby with my guitar and
voice, healthy protein rich diet with prenatal vitamins, oiling my body, and a
few larger works of art. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-02W1ORhySxQ/VZbHS-_knUI/AAAAAAABPAU/VlHdS6dZyaQ/s1600/chani.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-02W1ORhySxQ/VZbHS-_knUI/AAAAAAABPAU/VlHdS6dZyaQ/s320/chani.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Full Moon/Venus-Jupiter Thoughts from Chani</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Nevertheless, I’m
seeking that fire (in the belly?) that I must simply write about this or this…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Doctor, you tell
me …<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Midwife, you tell
me…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Mother, you tell
me...???<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Or,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Growing up and motherhood…tackling
inner demons of what this all means? How
living on a boat and not an apartment or home help. Doing it uniquely…trying to not repeat the
same mistakes of my parents, my mother…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Or, the silence of
growing a baby…</span><span style="font-family: Bernard MT Condensed, serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-15779940455023137462015-06-08T10:20:00.000-07:002015-06-08T10:20:01.915-07:00Summer 2015 and Catching Up with the Online World<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>This Summer:</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">This summer I find myself able to create the space to finally write, paint, play music, and maintain, to a certain degree, my website in progress and my blog long ignored. </span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">This academic year of teaching Gender and Ethnic Studies in L.A and living on a sailboat in Ventura has been quite full. What adds to this year's fullness is the arrival of a baby in my body! Both a long time in my planning -- nearly 5 years -- as well as a wonderful surprise, this baby makes me deeply happy. I've been diving into, as you can imagine, research on the subject of birthing babies, and now, I've firmly settled on my birth partners. We've also had a few showers and will have more before the baby is due in September. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3mzGxWHy2II/VXXNPY48SSI/AAAAAAABLOk/7tb7SNeHAWU/s1600/baby.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3mzGxWHy2II/VXXNPY48SSI/AAAAAAABLOk/7tb7SNeHAWU/s320/baby.png" width="228" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>Old Travelogues:</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I have been writing snippets for the blog on my computer, but I haven't had wifi access on the boat. Thus, here are a few travelogue pieces from 2015:</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>4 June 15<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I’ve survived the
transition of Zack’s leaving for fishing.
I cried buckets the few days before we said goodbye, so much so,
perhaps, that I wept a bit the way home from the airport, and then cried no
more. Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday
morning all were spent in clearing the way for art and writing. I literally cleaned my bedroom and what I am
calling the creative room, and then I did so with my “home” work pile up. Unemployment for part-time lecturer work,
check. 200 bucks a week. Billing
verification for prenatal and birth care, check. 10% in network, 40% out. Women baby showers for July planned,
check. Gym and yoga, check. Oliver care, check. Midwife and doula meetings, check. And so much more really.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Now, this
afternoon, thank goodness, I had the space to both write, paint, and play
music. I am grateful for the magic that
I experienced in these creative activities. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>12 April 15<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">It’s been a moment
since I last wrote, and it’s been too long since I have posted on the old
blog. I’ve been reluctant to change it
up and develop the cristinagolondrina website even though it’s marketed in my
bios for conferences and artshows. I
still can’t decide on how to begin. And,
then, of course, I imagine a link to boat thoughts and…most recent news…baby
thoughts. Just about right after that
last blog post, on Jan 20 to be exact, I discovered I was with child, and since
then, of course, life has really transformed.
That same day, Jan 20, I began the teaching for the Spring 2015 semester
two classes on an intro to Women’s Studies, and combined baby and teaching has
really quite consumed my energy.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">When I speak about
energy, I mean it. From about Jan 20 til
the beginning of April, I slept more than half of it in deep and rich dream
filled naps and nights. I also completed
changed my diet and ate protein and smaller meals that I planned out; started up
on pre-natals, folic acid, and DHA as well as iron, calcium, and chlorophyll;
and, saw an acupuncturist and chiropractor and learned that I needed to stay
warm (No cold beverages, always dry my hair) and eat papayas, kiwi, avocado,
yams, and spinach. I then read Ina May
and Birthing from Within, and between doctor visits to Kaiser – that included
an ultrasound (no twins), an image of an amoeba with legs, and a 180bpm heart
beat – we also began the journey of deciding on genetic non-invasive blood
testing. We emerged an eternity later
with a healthy prognosis and a midwife named Racha out of the LA Community
Birth Center in midtown. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Currently, we’ve
got these things on the table:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">-<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">We are
pausing to transform some of the old gender/sex roles brainwashed into us since
birth so that we can fully be present to our child (we know the sex from the
blood tests) before we announce the sex to the world. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">-<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">We are
looking for a home – a larger boat ideally.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">-<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">We are
getting a registry ready for our sisters, who are throwing us baby celebrations
this month and next. In this, we are
learning about what we actually need. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">As the baby prep
continues, I’ve also had the honor of presenting at a couple conferences,
helping to plan women speakers on campus, and I’ve been painting again as well. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>18 jan 15<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">We made a grand
dive out on Santa Cruz. First, free
diving in the kelp forests; I could see the light coming through the leaves,
and I remembered diving in Hawaii. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Then, scuba diving
around the corner; I found an abalone shell, and I saw the great big orange
fish – the Garibaldi. And the seal that
swam under us as we snorkeled we saw again I suppose when we were deeper scuba
diving…at our eye level. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Afraid at first,
but confident soon. Yes!</span><span style="font-family: Bernard MT Condensed, serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>11 jan 15<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Woke up to big leaks in the v-berth. Luckily, all were along side the starboard wall…so I wasn’t wet though the edges of my sleepside were. I let the berth dry today, and Zack washed the sheets among other things because he woke up sick in the middle o</span></span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;">f the night. </span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"> </span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;">Because of the rain we had a bunch of wet towels and such, so the laundry was needed.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I went out for a walk with Mr. O this morning and took a shower before getting ready for a day in the city with Reyna, Erynn, and Leti. It was a day of finding a princess dress and speaking Spanish as well as finally finding a beautiful poncho I can wear for work.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Returning to the boat, it’s relatively dry, and we put on the heater (from the Goodwill and only 8 bucks). Zack is still sick and I put on my lullaby playlist on Pandora. The good neighbor Greenwells bought Z some tom yum gang and we share this. I alslo open a bottle of the Toolin Around (Zack’s Aunt’s wine) I won for Christmas in the exchange. I’m nearly ready for bed after pulling with coconut oil the bad things from my teeth, swishing with salt water and now brushing. I’m a little concerened because I have’t started my moon. Feeling the heaviness though. Mostly concerned because of the wine I drank these last two weeks. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>10 January 15</i></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">It’s now been a little over 4 months since Z and I moved onto our Islander 30 mkii Sailboat. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Today is a rainy day, and we’ve been working inside. The work includes refinishing the wood, replacing the head (bathroom) sink hose, and installing a co/smoke detector in the v-berth (the second cabin and “master bedroom” of the boat). <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Oliver (my nearly 9 year old Cavalier) sleeps is the salon on my right as I type at our dining table that converts into a bed when we have company.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">These last few weeks have been full of holiday celebrations as well as taking time to envision our future. This week has been putting visions into action. We ..<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Got up for a moment to check on an old leak. We have tarps covering a vulnerable area on the starboard (right side) of the boat where the toe rail (made of teak and helpful for not falling when walking on the deck) has some holes we guess. Unfortunately, the tarp isn’t covering a big spot where the chain plate (metal plates that are integral to the boat) comes through into the cabin. These chain plates anchor the standing rigging that keeps the mast in place. A leak is alarming but not that special when it comes to other boats in the harbor.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>The Plan:</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">To finally develop "z website" and to write about:</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">My partner’s message to our child.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">My tribute to my partner before Father’s Day.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">The baby moving.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 17.1200008392334px;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">The leaving of our boat home…the future plan this year, and the next five years…</span></span></div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-26311970340693110832014-11-06T19:28:00.001-08:002014-11-06T19:28:30.511-08:00Recent Publications and Doings<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RaFOcoEdP7s/VFw67jxm63I/AAAAAAABHAk/ZkyIM7uY0-0/s1600/10570317_10152612854155622_651969607489135593_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RaFOcoEdP7s/VFw67jxm63I/AAAAAAABHAk/ZkyIM7uY0-0/s1600/10570317_10152612854155622_651969607489135593_n.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a>I had hoped to have a fine website by now, but I've been delayed. For good reason, really; I got a job as a professor of Women's Studies at CSUDH, and I've continued presenting on my findings. Oh, and we bought a sailboat. <br />
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-QjbCDbmYJco/VFw67psNO8I/AAAAAAABHAc/TemUtSgXlhQ/s1600/10405539_10152742298150622_6598216808830088559_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-QjbCDbmYJco/VFw67psNO8I/AAAAAAABHAc/TemUtSgXlhQ/s1600/10405539_10152742298150622_6598216808830088559_n.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a><br />
More on these things to come. <br />
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<br />
For now, I'd like to celebrate some publications and exhibitions. <br />
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Here they are from my cv:<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-NM1vZwN84G8/VFw67n6so3I/AAAAAAABHAg/WitsAxtVV2A/s1600/10592650_10152674845030622_7244685860703102859_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-NM1vZwN84G8/VFw67n6so3I/AAAAAAABHAg/WitsAxtVV2A/s1600/10592650_10152674845030622_7244685860703102859_n.jpg" height="200" width="150" /></a><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="IT" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: IT;"></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="IT" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: IT;">PUBLICATIONS<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/RegeneracionTlacuilolliUclaRazaStudiesJournal" target="_blank"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt;">“mumbling of prayers,” </span></b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Regeneración Tlacuilolli: UCLA Raza Studies Journal</span></i></a><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/RegeneracionTlacuilolliUclaRazaStudiesJournal" target="_blank">, 2014</a>.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.prairiewolfpress.com/issue_viii_fall_2014/ah_abuela_by_cristina_rose" target="_blank">“Ah, Abuela,” Prairie WolfReview. 2014</a></div>
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<a href="http://labelmelatin.com/" target="_blank"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt;">“I Ask My Younger Sister,” </span></b><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt;">Label Me Latina/o Literary Review</span></i></a><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://labelmelatin.com/" target="_blank">. 2014.</a> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://blotterature.com/category/contest/" target="_blank">“Tita Tells Me,” Blotterature LiteraryReview. 2014.</a></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PIdV7O-rS5Q/VFw68fR3EpI/AAAAAAABHAo/Z6iYpPwnG0I/s1600/10672391_10152742298460622_7521548614783214730_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PIdV7O-rS5Q/VFw68fR3EpI/AAAAAAABHAo/Z6iYpPwnG0I/s1600/10672391_10152742298460622_7521548614783214730_n.jpg" height="200" width="150" /></a><br />
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="IT" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: IT;">ART Exhibits<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="http://www.filamarts.org/fpac-about/" target="_blank">“Sacred Heart of Mango,” at the City of Los Angeles’ 23rd Annual Festival of Philippine Arts andCulture (FPAC 23), Los Angeles, October 5-6, 2014</a></div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-52742918557586233422014-06-09T13:02:00.002-07:002014-06-09T13:04:41.244-07:00Done Graduated: Introducing Dr. Cristina <div align="left" class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9qK9oaALmL4/U5YRRFThZjI/AAAAAAAA0xc/Onz5an4sReY/s1600/ciis+wse+grad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9qK9oaALmL4/U5YRRFThZjI/AAAAAAAA0xc/Onz5an4sReY/s1600/ciis+wse+grad.jpg" height="200" style="cursor: move;" width="200" /></a><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> I can hardly believe it’s been a couple weeks since I’ve
posted and a month since a more formal post on my dissertation. Since submitting my dissertation for
publication on May 3, so much has occurred. Where do I begin?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="left" class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Hkxi3zym_44/U5YRQzh4CQI/AAAAAAAA0xk/jtjwpHw1b7Q/s1600/dad+and+i+grad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Hkxi3zym_44/U5YRQzh4CQI/AAAAAAAA0xk/jtjwpHw1b7Q/s1600/dad+and+i+grad.jpg" height="320" width="180" /></a><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Well,
first, I’ve called the last few weeks since commencement as “Season of
Celebration.” Commencement weekend itself
was its own transformation. A batek, a big party at Jill’s in Berkeley, and commencement
itself. Celebratory yes but also ceremonial
intense.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IHr90UTdKKM/U5YRS2oJ5QI/AAAAAAAA0xw/sG-leBj-sHE/s1600/jills+grad+party.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IHr90UTdKKM/U5YRS2oJ5QI/AAAAAAAA0xw/sG-leBj-sHE/s1600/jills+grad+party.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Getting away
to Santa Cruz – Brighton State Beach – was a relaxing response to the prep and parties
as was some time with family and on the central coast with my love. Celebration season finished back down in Los Angeles
for my final party at my family home in Whittier. Just so great! Altogether, my parties brought so
many precious loved ones together, and I’m grateful for the good folk who have been
a part of my educational journey.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-A5Z6LCXGOPQ/U5YRRH8G6sI/AAAAAAAA0xY/258h3mvNXuE/s1600/fam+party+grad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-A5Z6LCXGOPQ/U5YRRH8G6sI/AAAAAAAA0xY/258h3mvNXuE/s1600/fam+party+grad.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Second, I’m proud to share that I am the “owner” of a
website: cristinagolondrina.com. For now, it really goes back to this blog at
blogspot; however, I have high hopes for it to be a place to showcase my
writing and artwork. As I look for
teaching and organizing work in the Autumn, I’m establishing myself as an
independent writer-artist. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> In part
this is because my summer has developed into quite the artist-writer season. Just this month includes my artwork in exhibits
in L.A. and Berkeley, Filipina-Indigenous weekly dancing, and VONA’s creative writing
workshop too! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Indeed, the
two projects taking the most energy right now are: 1. Prepping my blog
formatted in such a way that I can submit it as a manuscript to work on at VONA
workshop. And 2. Revising and submitting
my resume/cv out into the world with my sister network. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span><b style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;">CRISTINA ROSE SMITH, PhD</span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="_GoBack"></a></span></div>
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<b><span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">EDUCATIONAL
BACKGROUND:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">PhD</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">,
Women’s Spirituality, Philosophy and Religion, California Institute of Integral
Studies. <u>Proposed Dissertation</u>: “A
Labyrinthine Altar to Integrative Solidarity: A Mestiza (Xicana, Filipina, and
Euroamerican) Approach to Multiethnic Creative Texts.” 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">MA</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">,
English Literature, California State University, Long Beach. <u>Emphasis</u>: Women’s Literature. <u>Thesis</u>: “The Female Literary Tradition: Surrogate Mother-teachers in Mary
Wollstonecraft's "Original Stories" and "Maria" and George
Eliot's "The Mill on the Floss" and "Romola.” 2008.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">BA</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">,
English Writing, Biola University, La Mirada, California. <u>Concentration</u>: Classical Literature.
2002.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Academic
Interests in Teaching and Research: </span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Transformational
Multiculturalism, Gender, Race, Multiethnic Pedagogy, Women’s Writing,
Multiethnic Studies, <i>Mestiza </i>Consciousness
and Gloria E. Anzaldua, Post-colonial Studies, Indigenization, Feminist/Womanist
Studies, Decolonization, Multiethnic and Multicultural Literature, Ecofeminist,
Eco<i>Mestiza </i>Thought, Pedagogies of the
Sacred<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">PUBLICATIONS<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">“Tita Tells
Me,” </span></b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Framing Our Stories: An Anthology of
Inter-generational Writings</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">. The
Alvarado Project Press. San Francisco. Expected release date: end August, 2014<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">“Herstory of
Creation,” </span></b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Ofrendas
of the Flesh</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">. Mujeres de Maiz Press, Los Angeles.
2014.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">“Dearest Lola
Yolanda,” </span></b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Verses
Typhoon Yolanda: A Storm of Filipino Poets</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">. Meritage
Press, San Francisco. 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">"La
Golondrina Ibon." </span></b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Baybayin</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">.
Kabuay Press. San Francisco. 2013.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">PAPER
PRESENTATIONS<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">National Women’s Studies Association (NWSA), Puerto
Rico. <u>Paper Title:</u> "Mestiza
Daughters in Conversation: Spiritual-Feminist Examination of Mestiza Identity.”
November 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">MALCS (Mujeres Activas en Letras y Cambio Social)
Summer Institute, Northern New Mexico College.
<u>Paper Title:</u> “Embodied Mapping: A <i>Mestiza </i>(Xicana, Filipina, and Euroamerican) Approach to Home.”
July 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">Gender and Women’s Studies Section, Western Social
Science Conference (WSSA), Albuquerque, NM.
<u>Paper Title:</u> “Mestiza Xicanas and Mestiza Filipinas: Borderland
and Diasporic Literary Mestizaje.” April 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">The Association for the Study of Women and Mythology
(ASWM), San Antonio, TX. <u>Paper Title:</u> Finding Solidarity in Mutiethnic
Creative Writing.” March 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">American Literature
Association (ALA) Symposium, "The Latina/o Literary Landscape."</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">
San Antonio, TX. <u>Paper Title:</u> “Finding
Solidarity in Transformational Multiethnic and Spiritual Creative Writing:
A (Xicana, Filipina, and Euroamerican) <i>Mestiza</i> Approach to
Literary Critical Methodologies.” </span><span lang="IT" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-ansi-language: IT; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">March 2014.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><span lang="IT" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-ansi-language: IT; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">“El Mundo Zurdo,”
Society for Gloria Anzaldua, San Antonio, TX.
</span><u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Paper Title</span></u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">:
“Xicana, Filipina, and Euroamerican Transformational Integration in Solidarity
in Multiethnic Creative Writing.” November 2013.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">American Academy of Religion Conference/ Western Region,
Tempe AZ. Women’s Caucus. <u>Paper Title</u>: “Bioregionalism and
Collaboration: Allies in the Ventura County Grassroots Community.” March 2013<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">9<sup>th</sup> Mindanao International Studies
Society (MISS) Convention 2013, Zamboanga City, Philippines. <u>Presentation Title</u>: “Multiethnic
Goddesses.” February 2013. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">American Academy of Religion/ National Conference,
Chicago, IL. Women of Color Scholarship,
Teaching, and Activism. <u>Paper Title</u>: “Sacred Ecowoman: Naming and
Reclaiming.” October 2012<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">American Academy of Religion Conference/ Western
Region, Whittier, CA. Goddess Studies I: The Virgin Mary Across and Beyond the
Americas: Merging Cultural Realities and
Emergent Manifestations. <u>Paper Title</u>:
“Embodied Restless, <i>Mestiza- </i>Feminist
Spirituality, and the Divine Feminine.” March 2011. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">“(dis)junctions 2008: Where the Streets are
Re-named” Conference, University of California, Riverside, CA. <u>Paper Title</u>: “God’s Delight in Eve’s
Dancing in ‘Mazes Intricate’: Labyrinths and A(Maze)ment in Milton’s Paradise
Lost.” April 2008.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">Hawaii International Conference on Arts and
Humanities, Honolulu, HI. <u>Paper Title</u>: “Extending the Female Literary
Tradition: The Need for and Fulfillment of Surrogate Mother-Teacher Figures in
the Lives of Mary Wollstonecraft and George Eliot.” January 2008.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">ART Exhibits<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;">“Sacred Heart of Mango,” at "The Arrival of the 12th Poblador,"<b> </b>The Pico
House, El Pueblo Historical Monument, Los
Angeles, May 9 - 25, 2014<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 8pt;"> "Sacred Heart of Mango Xicana-Pinay"
and "Sacred Heart and Mango with Roses and Fire," “IMPACT,” DISCLOSE and Worth Ryder Gallery, UC
Berkeley, June 7-13, 2014<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: red;"><br /></span></div>
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-49488088423874263742014-05-15T13:29:00.001-07:002014-05-15T13:29:13.930-07:00A bit more fun: For the WSE Newsletter/ TAing for Ana Castillo<br />
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<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This
semester, I have the honor of being the Teaching Assistant for Ana Castillo and
her class “Writing Spiritual Memoir.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Castillo, as I wrote in my application for this TA position, is one of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">those</i> writers for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Reading her work changed my life, and I
remember the first time I read her novel <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">So
Far From God, </i>which is<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>set in a
part of New Mexico where I have motherline roots<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>I remember where I was
both locationaly and contextually in my life when I read this story:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Monterey, California; an undergrad at an
evangelical Christian university in love with Keats and the Romantics; 21 years
old.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">nuevo mexicana</i> roots myself, I read Castillo’s revision of the “Way
of the Cross” to Chimayo (sacred Earth in NM) with her character <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">la Loca</i>, and I felt intimately connected
to the procession!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you haven’t read this novel, I can’t
recommend it enough, particularly this scene in Chimayo.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Indeed, reading <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">So Far From God </i>over ten years ago, I was so affected that it
lingered with me, so much, in fact, that the novel plays a key part in my
dissertation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Altogether, this
class is unique to me (even though I have been a TA before in other really exciting
classes) both because the teacher and her writing are key figures in my life
and because of the focus of the class as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My studies align with “Writing Spiritual Memoir”; in particular, I am
attempting to integrate spiritual memoir writing into the academic framework of
a dissertation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thus, for all these
reasons, I feel a synergy in being Ana Castillo’s TA, additionally because it
is my final semester at CIIS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean,
how perfect is that?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">To give a
brief overview: Castillo’s “Writing Spiritual Memoir” is a hybrid class.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We met face to face in January for a weekend,
and now the class discussions and assignments are continuing online.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although a hybrid class can be tricky – we
must have different expectations on caucus than in face to face classroom
settings – the class topic is perhaps ideal for this situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Writing spiritual memoirs takes a lot of
solitary time to self-reflect and then put it all on paper. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Maestra
Castillo’s exercises and assignments encourage the students to think about
their lives as a whole and then to dive into a particularly poignant
memory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her words free memoir writing
from having to be objective or chronological.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her suggestions call students into more depth and intimate engagement
with their stories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, too, Castillo asks students to<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(re)consider their definition of spirituality
with assignments to read a memoir of their choice along with Castillo’s
anthology, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Diosas de las Americas
/Goddesses of the Americas.</i> </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Overall, from
a TA’s perspective, “Writing Spiritual Memoir” has been both affirming as well
as challenging.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Through this class at
CIIS, there is great opportunity to both learn from Castillo as well as to
learn from ourselves through the spiritual memoir writing process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am excited to see how the semester
continues.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Moreover, I
am excited to connect with Castillo more having been given this great chance to
work with her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Castillo offered the
class the chance to join in on her writing workshop in Chimayo in April for
Holy Week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will be there along with
another student in the class.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Last,
being there for Holy Week, I will have the opportunity to actually walk the “Way
of the Cross” procession with this amazing writer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would never have thought it possible as I
was reading <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">So Far From God </i>so long
ago; however, I am not so surprised.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "High Tower Text","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Truly, mine
is a story of much synergy, or good luck, in the WSE program, and I am grateful
to have been a part of this community of sister scholars for the last four and
half years.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: High Tower Text;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: High Tower Text;"><br /></span></div>
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-39289052621642506192014-05-13T22:56:00.002-07:002014-05-13T22:59:11.956-07:00A Bit of Fun: Testimonial and Photograph for WSE blog I wrote in early April<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Before entering the Women’s Spirituality
program at CIIS, Cristina was a writing teacher at CSU, Long Beach.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Along with teaching at CSULB, she also worked
as an interfaith chaplain and helped to coordinate, at the Women’s Resource
Center (WRC) on campus, a project to end violence towards women students.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">She had studied English Women’s Literature
for her BA and MA, and she was trying to figure out the next step for
herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Decreasing funds for teachers
and project coordinators on campus were forcing many of her colleagues to leave
California, and Cristina thought it was probably a good time to go back to
school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her own personal life
circumstances also encouraged her to make a change with her life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Being a lover of literature, I escaped
into books and pretended that the traumas of life didn’t exist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t know how to live in reality, and
after being trained as a sexual assault crisis counselor with the WRC, I realized
I had been living in a rape culture all along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I realized violence was normal in my daily life, and I decided I had had
enough.”</span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">One of Cristina’s mentors at the WRC told
her about the PhD program in Women’s Spirituality at CIIS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At the same time, Cristina was invited to
co-coordinate a farm community with four other women.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She decided to enter the WSE program as a
semi-distance student. </span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“It was perfect. I worked on the farm all
day – weeding and harvesting – and then I worked on my papers on ecofeminist
thought!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before entering the PhD
program,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had no idea that women and
the Earth were an integral part of women’s spirituality! That year turned out
all kinds of synergy.”</span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Finishing her first year and writing, in
that, a paper on her motherline, Cristina decided it was time to explore her Xicana
and Filipina ancestral lineage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While
completing her coursework, she traveled to New Mexico and the Philippines.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was able to meet and learn from her
personal role models, including Leny Strobel, Cherrie Moraga, and Ana
Castillo.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And through WSE, she worked
as Ana Castillo’s Teaching Assistant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cristina
connected with scholars in the fields of mestiza discourse, pedagogies of the
sacred, and indigenous Filipina epistemologies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Suddenly I was writing a dissertation that
brought together my love of literature as well as acknowledged the painful
experiences in myself, my ancestors, and my communities due to racism and
colonization as well as sexism and patriarchy.”</span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As Cristina wrote her dissertation, she
also developed her creative writing and has had a few of her pieces published
in anthologies such as <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Mujeres de Maiz:
Ofrendas of the Flesh </i>and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Verses
Typhoon Yolanda: A Storm of Filipino Poets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></i></span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></i></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Cristina is currently working to complete
her dissertation. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check out her
progress at cristyroses.blogspot.com.</span><br />
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<br /><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt 0.5in;">
<span style="mso-no-proof: yes;"><img height="200" 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" 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<br />dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-34973472991649597762014-05-04T16:32:00.001-07:002014-05-10T12:36:37.789-07:00"Sacred Heart of Mango"<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sacred Heart of Mango</td></tr>
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This is from my new water-coloring series called “Sacred Heart of Mango.” Below is my short artist bio and artistic statement. I had fun writing these!</div>
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<i><span lang="IT" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><b>Cristina Golondrina Rose, Artist<o:p></o:p></b></span></i></div>
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<i><span lang="IT" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><b>Short Bio<o:p></o:p></b></span></i></div>
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<b><i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;">Cristina is the daughter of Debra of Los Angeles and grand-daughter of Priscilla of New Mexico and Concepcion of the Philippines.</span></i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><b>A writer and artist, Cristina was born in LA and is now a PhD student in Pinay-xicana mestiza spirituality, literature, and art. She has taught English and organized women’s empowerment circles at CSU, Long Beach. She also worked on sustainable farms. Currently, she volunteers for the Center for Babaylan Studies and the San Francisco Asian Art Museum’s annual Fil-Am celebration. While completing her dissertation, she engages with water-colors in order to speak to her Filipina-Xicana multiplicity.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><b>Artistic Statement<o:p></o:p></b></span></i></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-3qLR7BT07-g/U2bLAbCZmGI/AAAAAAAA0kQ/dAX-Vo3xPkA/s1600/sacredmangoandheart+cropped+(1024x765).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-3qLR7BT07-g/U2bLAbCZmGI/AAAAAAAA0kQ/dAX-Vo3xPkA/s1600/sacredmangoandheart+cropped+(1024x765).jpg" height="239" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sacred Heart and Mango</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><b>Juicy, sweet, and altogether amazing, mangos are a sacred fruit among Pinays and Pinoys. This spiritual connection to mangos for Filipinas and the long history of mangos both in the Philippines as well as Mexico got me thinking. As a Pinay-Xicana, I’ve worked to understand the shared religiosity, spirituality, and culture between my ancestral ethnicities. However, I needed an image that integrated these multiplicities in a way that the written (linear and dualistic) language, particularly English, cannot. Enter the sacred heart of mango.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"><b>Painting these beautiful images is a ceremony for me. The gold, red, blue, and green colors are the diction I employ to tell this story of merging families and emerging cultural transformation. </b></span><br />
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-19501206780048113372014-05-02T13:46:00.001-07:002014-05-02T13:46:21.961-07:00Research and Writing as Ceremony: Concluding Thoughts on My Acknowledgements Page and Submitting for Publication Today<div class="MsoNormal">
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Today truly marks the end of “an era” for me if you
will. I put Chopin on my record player,
I offered a ritual to <i>la Virgen</i>; and,
now, I am now letting go of my dissertation, accepting where it is just now, acknowledging
that the work never really stops, and submitting it for publication.</div>
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Well, in a few hours, that is. I first need to revamp the “Acknowledgements”
Page. Thus far I have three sentences
thanking my mothers and teachers for, I write, inspiring in me a “love of
literature, of women, and of darkness.” </div>
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However, I really want to say so much more (maybe not
thanking individuals as I did with my MA thesis though). </div>
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In an earlier blog, I began writing about my whole journey
of education. Still, I wasn’t sure just
then that I would be graduating (and, to tell
the truth, I really still have my doubts even now! Right? That whole “imposter
syndrome” perhaps). I wrote that blog
because I woke up in the middle of the night thinking, “Holy Moly! This is the
end of the road for me. That is, the road ends here. Phd means final final, the ultimate
destination for formal education. I
mean, there’s always “post-doctoral” work, and, of course, the perpetual
student I am (my identity so wrapped up in this!), more research and writing
sounds great (AFTER A LONG SUMMER BREAK!!).
Nevertheless, I’ve been in school (off and on, but mostly on) for 30
years of my life.</div>
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Brief history of my formal education:</div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Preschool at Shepherd of the Hills and Hillcrest
in Whittier (don’t remember much, but I do have a friend still—we went to JH,
HS, Biola, and CSULB together)</div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]--> K-5 at
Murphy Ranch (my memories of this time are pretty negative, but I do have a
friend still –need to send her a grad announcement)</div>
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</span><!--[endif]-->6<sup>th</sup> grade at Granada Middle School.
Ditto about hating it.</div>
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</span><!--[endif]-->7-8 Whittier Christian Junior High. Loved it.
Turning point. Writing my spiritual memoir, I return to this transition. Friends – these are also friends from church –
still from here. </div>
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</span><!--[endif]-->9-12 Whittier Christian High School. Again.
Loved it. On cheer and on homecoming court.
Glorious time of life. </div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Undergrad at Biola in La Mirada. Also. Loved it.
I studied English Writing and Literature. Mentors: Doland, Reynolds, and
Callis. Travels to Oxford, Bahia de los
Angeles, Washington, D.C., Greece, Italy, the UK, India, Prince Edward Island,
and around the U.S., especially New Mexico</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->MA at CSULB.
Studied English Literature again. Loved it and the whole LB experience. Mentors: Lau, Sinclair, Coenen, and
Wakelee-Lynch. Travels to France,
Belgium, Switzerland, Italy again,
Guanajuato, New Mexico</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->PhD at CIIS in San Fran. Studied Women’s Spirituality. Loved it.
Mentors: Arora, Pacheco, and Strobel.
Travels to Malta, the Greek Islands, Spain, the Philippines, New Mexico.
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I started preschool (I just asked my mom) when I was 4, and
now, at 34, I’ll graduate with a PhD. As
I write that last sentence, and let it sink in, I start to cry actually. That’s how much value I’ve placed (albeit
hecka encouraged by my family and teachers) on this degree. Did I know I always wanted it? No. Did I doubt that it was possible? Yes. Even
now. However, perhaps like some people –
myself included sometimes – want a kid but never let themselves imagine it is
for them; I have wanted this profoundly and not let myself hope it could be
something I would attain. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I mean, although my family values education, an MA let alone
a PhD has been concretely unattainable (and undesirable) for many of family
members. Both sexism (you need to read
Virginia Woolf’s <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Room_of_One's_Own">A Room of One’s Own</a>) and racism (I recommend <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Decolonizing-Epistemologies-Philosophy-Transdisciplinary-Theological/dp/082324136X">DecolonizingEpistemologies</a>) have created insurmountable obstacles in the educational lives
of my grandmothers, mothers, aunts, primas, and sisters. And, I am a lucky one (mujer, m’jita, nina,
kaka, ate) graduating with a Phd in her thirties! Miraculous!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, how do I say thank you for all this???? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Here goes:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I must acknowledge that without my family’s imagination and
strength in the face of overwhelming obstacles due to sexism and racism, I
would not have the opportunity to research, write, and submit this dissertation.
I am grateful for my family’s support,
in particular, their encouragement of my formal education. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Specifically, I want to thank the nurturing women in my
family as well as the women in my chosen family. You are my role models in your creation of liberative
visions and languages for our future. Together,
we have come so far! What we have
accomplished is miraculous! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Additionally, I want to acknowledge the men who have
supported me during my journey. Grandfathers,
fathers, brothers – my allies – gratitude for all the ways you advocate for me –
your daughter, your sister, your love – and my freedom to write my story.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Altogether, thank you </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
to each of you</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
who has inspired in
me a love</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
of literature,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
of women,</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
and of darkness.”</div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-59447540448604567402014-04-11T11:38:00.002-07:002014-04-11T11:38:46.862-07:00SouthWesting: Way South (for me)<div class="MsoNormal">
Currently, we are driving down the 469 from Logan to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Jon,_New_Mexico">SanJon</a>, New Mexico. The flat, wide open
spaces are covered with brush and maybe former grasslands. As we’ve been driving, we’ve suddenly come
upon surprising canyons with rivers as well as come out to great views. It’s surprising to me that we are not on sea
level when cruising these plains. Today
we are heading to Oklahoma via<a href="http://www.palodurocanyon.com/"> Palo Duro Canyon </a>in Texas (near Amarillo). </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After spending a solid 5 days at the family ranch, Rancho
Escondido, in Golondrinas, this excursion is quite refreshing even though I
miss the cool weather in the high desert with the cliffs on either side of our
dwelling by the Mora River. Although a
good chunk of time was spent there, we didn’t really get to explore but for a
couple days. Over the weekend, I was as
sick as I’ve been in a long time. My
family really took care of me and fed me all kinds of New Mexican feasts! We arrived with dear friends from California
– Jill and family – and that afternoon we wandered to the cave and around the
land. I had mostly told Jill the ranch
stories in our decade long correspondence, and I think for both of us, it was
like seeing a storybook of good friends on magic land become reality. After Jill’s departure, I just let myself
sleep, and the snowy weather seemed to support this decision. Eventually, I made my way out of the house,
and in the last couple days, we bicycled around Golondrinas and then explored
Vegas, high point having a beer at the Plaza Hotel that my family used to own. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Although it felt good to write in big letters “sick day” on
the calendar, I also felt the pressure to complete the small tasks I’ve put off
in the last month while editing my dissertation. Today marks almost two weeks since that last
deadline, and in these two weeks, I’ve really been able to get some things
accomplished. This morning I wrote a
list:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]--><i><a href="http://www.malcs.org/">MALCS </a></i>cfpapers for presentation </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Decolonial Love<i> <a href="http://asusjournal.org/">As Us</a></i> cfpoetry</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]--><i><a href="http://www.gloriaanzaldua.com/?page_id=4">SSGA </a></i>cfpapers for publication </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-size: 7pt;"> </span><a href="http://form.jotform.us/form/40766796765171">FilAm celebration</a> in downtown L.A. cf art!</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Paying my tech review (Holy Moly!)</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Keeping up with my TA work with <a href="http://www.anacastillo.com/">Ana Castillo</a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]--><a href="http://www.nwsa.org/content.asp?pl=15&sl=32&contentid=32"><i>NWSA </i>WoCLeadership </a>Project application</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Testimonial to my program for their website</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
A good deal of creative and enjoyable short pieces. </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
Additionally,
I found out that another of my poems, “Tita Tells Me,” has been accepted for
publication in a lovely Filipina anthology on intergenerational Fil-Ams.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
Altogether,
I’ve been writing creatively and water-coloring and really, I guess, marketing
my work to different groups out there that connect with my themes and
purposes. I’ve written a couple
different short bios and artistic intentions.
Perhaps the one I will share on this blog are from the school testimonial.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>Before entering the Women’s Spirituality
program at CIIS, Cristina was a writing teacher at CSU, Long Beach. Along with teaching at CSULB, she also worked
as an interfaith chaplain and helped to coordinate, at the Women’s Resource
Center (WRC) on campus, a project to end violence towards women students. </b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>She had studied English Women’s Literature
for her BA and MA, and she was trying to figure out the next step for
herself. Decreasing funds for teachers
and project coordinators on campus were forcing many of her colleagues to leave
California, and Cristina thought it was probably a good time to go back to
school. Her own personal life
circumstances also encouraged her to make a change with her life. </b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>“Being a lover of literature, I escaped
into books and pretended that the traumas of life didn’t exist. I didn’t know how to live in reality, and
after being trained as a sexual assault crisis counselor with the WRC, I realized
I had been living in a rape culture all along.
I realized violence was normal in my daily life, and I decided I had had
enough.”</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>One of Cristina’s mentors at the WRC told
her about the PhD program in Women’s Spirituality at CIIS. At the same time, Cristina was invited to
co-coordinate a farm community with four other women. She decided to enter the WSE program as a
semi-distance student. </b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>“It was perfect. I worked on the farm all
day – weeding and harvesting – and then I worked on my papers on ecofeminist
thought! Before entering the PhD
program, I had no idea that women and
the Earth were an integral part of women’s spirituality! That year turned out
all kinds of synergy.”</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>Finishing her first year and writing, in
that, a paper on her motherline, Cristina decided it was time to explore her Xicana
and Filipina ancestral lineage. While
completing her coursework, she traveled to New Mexico and the Philippines. She was able to meet and learn from her
personal role models, including Leny Strobel, Cherrie Moraga, and Ana
Castillo. And through WSE, she worked
as Ana Castillo’s Teaching Assistant. Cristina
connected with scholars in the fields of mestiza discourse, pedagogies of the
sacred, and indigenous Filipina epistemologies.
</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>“Suddenly I was writing a dissertation that
brought together my love of literature as well as acknowledged the painful
experiences in myself, my ancestors, and my communities due to racism and
colonization as well as sexism and patriarchy.”</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>As Cristina wrote her dissertation, she
also developed her creative writing and has had a few of her pieces published
in anthologies such as <i>Mujeres de Maiz:
Ofrendas of the Flesh </i>and <i>Verses
Typhoon Yolanda: A Storm of Filipino Poets.
</i></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b>Cristina is currently working to complete
her dissertation. Check out her
progress at cristyroses.blogspot.com.</b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 0in; mso-add-space: auto;">
</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<br /></div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-29013575819071209852014-03-29T12:25:00.000-07:002014-03-29T12:33:02.514-07:00SOUTHWESTING (and tech reviewing and submitting)<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kRRbyaxjiIw/UzcUdz2T35I/AAAAAAAA0fE/xthwQnQVytI/s1600/IMG_20140323_160225.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kRRbyaxjiIw/UzcUdz2T35I/AAAAAAAA0fE/xthwQnQVytI/s1600/IMG_20140323_160225.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">On the road.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
So, today I am in San Antonio at the ASWM (Association for the Study of Women and Mythology) conference on "Borderlands." Yesterday, I presented my work on "Stories of Multicultural 'Integrative Solidarity': A Mestiza (Xicana, Filipina, and Euroamerican) Approach to Creative Texts." It went so well (better than ever), and the discussion after, both yesterday and today, has been amazing. These are conversations on mestiza literature and indigenous epistemologies; moreover, how these topics intersect with our family histories as well as daily and very personal lives.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This conference comes at a perfect time. I feel so affirmed in my study, and this weekend ends up being a reunion and a celebration. We are not only celebrating our presentations; additionally, I am specifically also living it up after completing another revision of my dissertation after receiving my technical review! What a doozy! I must have put 100 hours in this last week, and it feels amazing to mail in the hard copy of this now very clean 341 page manuscript. </div>
<div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Also received some great news about my creative writing. March brings the publication of two of my creative works: one in <a href="http://versestyphoonyolanda.blogspot.com/">Verses Typhoon Yolanda: A Storm of Filipino Poets</a> and the other in <a href="http://www.mujeresdemaiz.com/Zine.html">Mujeres de Maiz.</a> Another great accomplishment in my life is my interaction with <a href="http://www.voicesatvona.org/">VONA</a> (Voices of Our Nation Foundation) this June. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I applied to VONA, giving my manuscript and writing:</div>
<div>
<div class="field type-2" style="background-color: white; border-bottom-color: rgb(231, 231, 231); border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 17px; line-height: 20px; padding: 20px;">
<strong>What drew you to the VONA/Voices Workshop?:</strong><br />
<span class="field-data">I am currently finishing up a dissertation entitled: An Altar to “Integrative Solidarity”: A Mestiza (Xicana, Filipina, and Euroamerican) Approach to Creative Texts. In this study, I delve into issues of internal divisions and new consciousness through a transformative engagement with multiculturalism. I also address how I am read as white in certain contexts, and I speak to my white privilege. I also engage with memories when I have been racially identified and exoticized. In this study, I explore my own creative texts (poetry and prose) using ethnoautobiographical methodologies. It is these creative texts that I hope to bring to the VONA / Voices workshop.</span></div>
<div class="field type-2" style="background-color: white; border-bottom-color: rgb(231, 231, 231); border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 17px; line-height: 20px; padding: 20px;">
<strong>What do you hope to accomplish in the VONA/Voices workshop?:</strong><br />
<span class="field-data">There are so many nuances to the conversation on being multi ethnic, locational, and cultural. What I hope to accomplish in the VONA/ Voices workshop is to dive into deeper engagement with this discourse, through my creative writing, among other writers of color. The diversity of writers that will be present at VONA/ Voices is inspiring and encouraging as well as challenging to me. I am grateful for the opportunity to apply.</span></div>
<div class="field type-2" style="background-color: white; border-bottom-color: rgb(231, 231, 231); border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 17px; line-height: 20px; padding: 20px;">
<strong>What does VONA/Voices mean to you as a writer of color?:</strong><br />
<span class="field-data">As a writer of color, VONA/ Voices signifies a place to be nurtured and challenged by established writers of color. It is a space to come face to face and learn from my role models. It is a sacred community I would be honored to engage with.</span></div>
<div class="field type-2" style="background-color: white; border-bottom-color: rgb(231, 231, 231); border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 17px; line-height: 20px; padding: 20px;">
<strong>What are your goals as a writer?:</strong><br />
<span class="field-data">My goals as a writer, finishing her PhD, are to refocus my energy on my heart, my creativity, and my body. I have had a couple recent publications of my creative work, which has surprised me. I wrote and submitted them in order to (re)engage with my dissertation from a new direction, and, admittedly, to take breaks in my academic writing. My hope is to approach my creative writing more directly in this next phase of life; I would like to stand in my power as a creative writer as well as an academic writer.</span></div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
In response to my submission, they wrote, "<em style="background-color: #f7f7f7; color: #666666; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">Terrific project. Auto-ethno-historio-hybrid-spiritual approach perfect for travel workshop."</em></div>
<div>
<em style="background-color: #f7f7f7; color: #666666; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></em></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zTrDijcipSE/UzcUatYL8PI/AAAAAAAA0e8/BnXCJW6M2ng/s1600/20140325_080502.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zTrDijcipSE/UzcUatYL8PI/AAAAAAAA0e8/BnXCJW6M2ng/s1600/20140325_080502.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sisterfriend's coffee shop in Phoenix</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
Finally, all this has gone down while we've been on the road "SouthWesting" as I'm calling it. This journey included a stop in Phoenix, <a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PEjTf0sSsdU/URvGHnjh8wI/AAAAAAAACRM/HNsrWZkMvaM/s1600/Balmorhea+State+Park.jpg">Balmorhea</a>, Austin, and San Antonio now and tomorrow to ABQ for my next presentation. Of course, the beautiful thing, too, is being able to visit bio family and chosen family. Let me conclude with some photographs from this journey:</div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U_J5e579PZw/UzcUe3ryh_I/AAAAAAAA0fM/p1k_iPQ4i_U/s1600/20140327_215124.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U_J5e579PZw/UzcUe3ryh_I/AAAAAAAA0fM/p1k_iPQ4i_U/s1600/20140327_215124.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">At the White Horse in Austin <br />
with friends from all over <br />
(Hong Kong, Chicago, CA)</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<br />
<br />
<div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-5iCwGVUvU0Y/UzcUhNrE7hI/AAAAAAAA0fg/OYwFkrW8sB8/s1600/IMG_20140329_084348.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-5iCwGVUvU0Y/UzcUhNrE7hI/AAAAAAAA0fg/OYwFkrW8sB8/s1600/IMG_20140329_084348.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Riverwalk in San Antonio<br />
with my cousin. <br />
Our great-grandmothers were sisters!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
</div>
</div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-51744386708344495942014-03-03T15:42:00.001-08:002014-03-03T15:42:44.675-08:00Keeping Perspective: The End in Sight<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of my entire school career: starting with
preschool and ending, to a certain degree, soon.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking I do not have to be in school.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of the family who went to school before me. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of being the sister, aunt, cousin, granddaughter,
daughter that has an MA, that will have a PhD. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of how I could have just become a monastic, an
ascetic, a flower shop owner, a wife, a pilot, a farmer, a priest, a pastor, a
suicide, a mother. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
How I could have done nothing. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
How I could still be and do or not do all these things, and,
yet, I’m here in a coffee shop on Shell Beach still working on my dissertation.
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of the space I inhabit here and now, and in
that space, I can simultaneously believe I am very productive and then fall into
thinking I am not accomplishing much at all; how I can feel that
everything I want to accomplish is easy
and, then suddenly, daunting.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of not succumbing to self-sabotage.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking of not betraying myself and my story.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking a lot.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Been thinking too much. </div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-18BgDUsvmlQ/UxUTGnpurSI/AAAAAAAA0c8/8fp8pgj_ZZ4/s1600/IMG_3064.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-18BgDUsvmlQ/UxUTGnpurSI/AAAAAAAA0c8/8fp8pgj_ZZ4/s1600/IMG_3064.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">With the Sequoias</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-68724734566989301512014-02-26T13:26:00.002-08:002014-02-26T13:32:32.246-08:00Defending and the Aftershock<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DGgjimNpuI0/Uw5ZpvE5QfI/AAAAAAAA0cE/CxwA9gCIXWQ/s1600/IMG_1333.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DGgjimNpuI0/Uw5ZpvE5QfI/AAAAAAAA0cE/CxwA9gCIXWQ/s1600/IMG_1333.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal;">This past weekend, I celebrated the hard work of prepping
and then defending my dissertation. That
moment – in the school room with my three committee members (one via skype), my
colleagues, my tutors, my accountability partners, and other teachers – I reached
my limit. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">There was something about the mixture of public speaking,
summarizing my work, embodying the vulnerability that is foundational to my
work, navigating desires to please my mentors, and also dealing with paperwork;
this mixture was almost too much. Too
much in the way that calculus and chemistry and physics were for me in high
school and undergrad. Too much in the
way that scuba diving through a tunnel 12 meters below the water’s surface were
for me in the Philippines. Of course, I
imagine that one day, I’ll be fine tackling mathematics and diving and perhaps
even speaking about my work. But, nearly
two hours of defending my study with all those other elements mentioned above
was crazy making. I am trying not to analyze the “why” behind my feelings too
much at this time; instead, I’d like to accept these feelings the way in which
I accept my brain doesn’t quite understand, at this time, higher levels of math
and deep levels of water. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8BMpTMJNrmo/Uw5ZrTsuAtI/AAAAAAAA0cM/yOyrs-M_IBk/s1600/IMG_20140220_212728.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8BMpTMJNrmo/Uw5ZrTsuAtI/AAAAAAAA0cM/yOyrs-M_IBk/s1600/IMG_20140220_212728.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Celebratory Dinner at Gracias Madre</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Thankfully, I will never have to participate in a “dissertation
defense” (so "masculine" of a term and action as a friend writes and as I concur) again.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That is, my dissertation was approved! I enjoyed much needed rest and relaxation
these past few days: therapies of all sorts including massages, the company of
friends around a fire, hiking, and kayaking through tunnels (above the water of
course). </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Now begins the final final revisions of formatting and
tightening up everything. </span></div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-27226457020583964192014-02-13T10:44:00.002-08:002014-02-13T10:44:45.507-08:00Graduating. Graduating? Graduating!<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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Yesterday, three great things happened. First, I finished
another complete revision of my dissertation; second, I spoke with my committee
chair; and three, I applied for graduation (and the publication of my
dissertation for a total almost $400). </div>
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<br /></div>
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Yep, I spent the morning finishing up the conclusion, and
then I had a meeting with my chair, and she said, “well, congratulations!” and
I said, “should I apply for graduation? Deadline is Friday” and she said, “yes!”</div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gbljf-qhdjI/Uv0SVE7jo_I/AAAAAAAA0bQ/0XyYdhFV2f4/s1600/IMG_3076.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gbljf-qhdjI/Uv0SVE7jo_I/AAAAAAAA0bQ/0XyYdhFV2f4/s1600/IMG_3076.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
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It’s funny because it’s still hard for me to believe that
graduation is coming. It’s that imposter
syndrome perhaps, and another part of it is superstition (like knock on wood); it’s like I don’t
want to, by celebrating my upcoming graduation, somehow stop it from happening.
</div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
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And, yet, here’s my chair saying, “do it! You’re ready!”
And, then there was the conversation with my second committee member, who said
I was far ahead of others preparing to graduate. </div>
dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-33061006086708197562014-02-05T14:16:00.001-08:002014-02-05T14:16:33.908-08:00It's been too long -- February Check-inWell, here it is -- February -- and although it may appear that I have been lazing it with the writing, I'm here today to testify to my great accomplishments this past month or so. True, I haven't been in the midst of my dissertation itself, but I have been writing and organizing. <br />
<br />
First, the writing: in the last few weeks, I have been a part of two amazing opportunities that are directly connected to my dissertation study. I attended a three day writing workshop with Maestra Cherrie Moraga, and I worked as a TA (and also attended) a spiritual memoir writing class with Maestra Ana Castillo. Both of these mujeres are pivotal in my PhD studies, and as a facebook friend noted, they are forces of nature. I strongly concur, and during the workshops, I wrote about my family/shame as well as spirituality/belonging. Then, I spent last week or so processing and letting myself be transformed by their guidance. Trying to let the transformation reach into my academic work as well as my personal growth.<br />
<br />
Second, during this time, I received feedback from my two other readers on my dissertation committee, and I spent some time in dialogue with them about how to incorporate Indigenous roots, linguistic integration, and decolonial emphasis into my dissertation. Big stuff I tell you; however, after it all (or in the midst of it all), I have a sense that although words may fail me, the creative aspect in my study will save me. <br />
<br />
Finally, my energy has been going toward making sure all the paperwork and organization was in place for me to graduate this coming May. Indeed, I am almost there, and after many emails, my dissertation defense is set:<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Women’s Spirituality<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Invites You to</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">A Doctoral
Dissertation Defense<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="font-size: x-small;">by<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span lang="PT-BR">Cristina Rose Smith</span><b><i><o:p></o:p></i></b></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>Finding Xicana, Filipina, and Euroamerican
Transformational Integration in Solidarity in Multiethnic Creative Texts:A
Mestiza Approach to Ethnoautobiographical and Literary Critical Methodologies</i><br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><i><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span lang="PT-BR"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Defense: 3:00pm tp 5:00pm, room 307<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span lang="PT-BR"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Celebration: 5:00pm to 6:00pm, room
308<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b><span lang="PT-BR">on Thursday, February 20, 2014</span><br />
</b><b><span lang="PT-BR">1453 Mission Street, room
425<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>Mestizas</i> embody the multiplicity of their ancestral locations,
ethnicities, and cultures. Being
"in all cultures at the same time," as Gloria Anzaldúa describes,
these multiethnic women are in the borderlands and the diaspora. Biologically woven in diversity, they are
often internally restless within a socially constructed racial framework that
would have them identify as either "women of color" or
"white" when they have Indigenous and Euroamerican subjectivities. In
particular, this study addresses those <i>Mestizas</i>
who have been raised to pass or cover as "white." Indeed, these women, and, I argue, all <i>Mestizas</i> must work towards integration
in solidarity, that is, internal as well as external integration (within
ourselves and women's spirituality communities) while bringing a conscious
solidarity to these relationships.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Organized around three
literary elements - characters, imagery, and diction - this study seeks this
integration in solidarity through juxtaposing creative texts that portray <i>Mestiza</i> multiplicity. Specifically,
using a transdisciplinary <i>Mestiza</i>
approach - bearing feminist and decolonial Indigenous lenses - with
ethnoautobiographical methodologies, this research explores my
Xicana-Filipina-Euroamerican creative texts to find these literary elements
which encourage "integration in solidarity within." Additionally,
employing a <i>Mestiza</i> approach to
literary criticism, this scholarship engages with four published works -
(Xicana) Ana Castillo's <i>So Far From God</i>,
(Filipinas) Jessica Hagedorn's <i>Dogeaters</i>
and Merlinda Bobis' <i>Flight is Song on
Four Winds</i>, and (Euroamerican) Starhawk's <i>The Fifth Sacred Thing </i>- to deepen this research of integration in
solidarity. Altogether, this
dissertation offers <i>nepantla</i> spaces
in which <i>Mestizas </i>– inspired by <i>nepantleras</i> and <i>babaylans</i>
– create <i>kapwa</i>.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span lang="PT-BR">Dissertation Committee Chair: </span>Alka Arora, Ph.D.<span style="color: red;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span lang="PT-BR" style="color: white; mso-ansi-language: PT-BR;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">mmnnnnnj</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Dissertation <span lang="PT-BR">Commitee Member: </span>Sandra
Pacheco, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span lang="PT-BR" style="color: white; mso-ansi-language: PT-BR;">nnnnnn </span><br />
Dissertation <span lang="PT-BR">External Member:
</span>Leny Strobel,
Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<br />
So, finally, a month and a half from submitting my study to my entire committee, I am back in a grounded place and space (the gorgeous Huasna Valley that reminds me so much of Mora County, New Mexico), plans have been made for the rest of the semester till I graduate, and feedback has been given (and more will come this next week) from each of my committee members. <br />
<br />
Thus, it is time to revise!<br />
<br />
(Ok, I do have to move into the new living space today, but I have the next 10 days to figure out what I can revise and what I can work on for "further study." Then, I'll email -- on February 14 is my goal -- the draft out again to everyone to prep them for the defense, and I'll have 5 days or so to prep myself for the defense too. And, really, I have a powerpoint and a prezi I've used before, so, really, it's just practicing and narrowing in on what I can cover in an hour presentation/defense.)<br />
<br />
But, it is time to revise, time to let myself fall back into my dissertation, time to make time, and time to believe in my study again. <br />
<br />
I write all this because it is a challenge and an opportunity; it is a walk through and with vulnerability and creativity; it is the place I must confront the imposter syndrome feelings, etc etc etc.<br />
<br />
Thankfully, my wombyn's circle on Monday tackled this issue head on, and I have a new vision board to help me!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Y-OJEkd8iMs/UvK4IjYeI_I/AAAAAAAA0ao/r1sByRbiVzI/s1600/out+of+place.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Y-OJEkd8iMs/UvK4IjYeI_I/AAAAAAAA0ao/r1sByRbiVzI/s1600/out+of+place.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Maestra Moraga's Writing Workshop Circle</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-58688365826472075712014-01-09T10:55:00.000-08:002014-01-09T10:55:01.250-08:002013 Annual Newsletter: Grieving the Times When Everything Was Not “OK.”<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Qr-jzt8WSag/Us7o5DHCi_I/AAAAAAAA0Vo/KTWLiey_kuc/s1600/golondrina.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Qr-jzt8WSag/Us7o5DHCi_I/AAAAAAAA0Vo/KTWLiey_kuc/s1600/golondrina.jpg" height="149" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">2013
has been a challenging year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-IgdXRy2cxG4/Us7o5cqpXmI/AAAAAAAA0Vk/-X_ZH67mt_M/s1600/motorbike.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-IgdXRy2cxG4/Us7o5cqpXmI/AAAAAAAA0Vk/-X_ZH67mt_M/s1600/motorbike.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a><span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">I
started this year in my paternal grandmother’s homeland, the Philippines.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I celebrated the new year on North Pandan
Island: watching turtles lay their eggs, seeing baby turtles born on the shore,
sleeping on the massage tables and hammocks, and diving Apo Reef (second
largest contiguous coral reef in the world!).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>-- </span><a href="http://whc.unesco.org/en/tentativelists/5033/"><span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><span style="color: blue;">http://whc.unesco.org/en/tentativelists/5033/</span></span></a><span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p></o:p></span><span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Spent
a good portion of my time in the Philippines in Palawan and the Visayan
region.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, I traveled with
Filipina-American manais (older sisters) to Mindanao and visited the Indigenous
tribal communities still thriving there. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was even asked to share my research on
women’s spirituality in Zamboanga.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-jDrtWrJerNQ/Us7o6yPbaaI/AAAAAAAA0WM/THyf1QzAC78/s1600/tribal.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-jDrtWrJerNQ/Us7o6yPbaaI/AAAAAAAA0WM/THyf1QzAC78/s1600/tribal.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Overall,
although this time had amazing moments of superb joy and beauty, I was also
really challenged by the hard realities of racism and sexism, which I perhaps
saw and felt more clearly traveling in South East Asia.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still, from these experiences I was able to
recognize much more clearly the multiple oppressions of race and sex in
California, in my history, and in my communities upon my return. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Returning
to California, I continued my graduate studies and lived between family and old
(now many farmer) friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To help
motivate myself, I wrote about my academic journey on my blog: cristyroses.blogspot.com.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the spring, I wrote and submitted my
dissertation proposal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the summer, I
advanced to candidacy and began writing the dissertation itself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, in the autumn, I submitted a complete
draft of my research!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve had many
opportunities to present my research along the way, and I’ve also been honored
to have my creative writing published in a handful of anthologies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In 2014, I hope to continue this presentation
and publication trend!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-x8XS8vBk7_Q/Us7o6O_ahTI/AAAAAAAA0V0/lHx4cD1MxEI/s1600/sandra.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-x8XS8vBk7_Q/Us7o6O_ahTI/AAAAAAAA0V0/lHx4cD1MxEI/s1600/sandra.jpg" height="150" width="200" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hAXJT-IAz9A/Us7o6YTKklI/AAAAAAAA0V8/qDnOUSEhAW0/s1600/tita.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-hAXJT-IAz9A/Us7o6YTKklI/AAAAAAAA0V8/qDnOUSEhAW0/s1600/tita.jpg" height="133" width="200" /></a><a href="https://www.blogger.com/" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a><a href="https://www.blogger.com/" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a><a href="https://www.blogger.com/" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GRo3w1WxOL8/Us7o58HAoiI/AAAAAAAA0WI/8oL_NFbwJBs/s1600/museum.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GRo3w1WxOL8/Us7o58HAoiI/AAAAAAAA0WI/8oL_NFbwJBs/s1600/museum.jpg" height="133" width="200" /></a><span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Additionally,
as a part of my school endeavors, I’ve been developing mentor relationships
with my dissertation committee members.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was with their encouragement that I
submitted and presented at the Gloria E. Anzaldua conference this year.<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Moreover,
with their support, I helped to facilitate community events with the Fil-Am
community in the Bay Area including the opening ceremony of Fil-Am day at the
Asian Art Museum.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EFuACia3aAM/Us7o5AEJI0I/AAAAAAAA0Vg/07O9hYZTjEU/s1600/eyes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EFuACia3aAM/Us7o5AEJI0I/AAAAAAAA0Vg/07O9hYZTjEU/s1600/eyes.jpg" height="200" width="119" /></a><span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Other
big mile markers?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In September, I
celebrated my birthday with an under the sea party.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In October, I journeyed to Alaska for some
adventures, and in November, I sprained my ankle badly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This injury is perhaps the biggest of my life
(lucky me right?), and it’s created a growing season these last couple
months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thankfully, I was still able to
join in on our annual Joshua Tree New Years Camping Week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What a glorious time!! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Aparajita","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Truly,
the holidays were so precious to me this year because of my travels last
year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, altogether, 2013 has been one
of growth for my creativity, my writing, and my whole integrated self.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t even imagine what 2014 will bring.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6849509254212330098.post-17521341719833948672013-12-12T10:02:00.000-08:002013-12-12T10:02:19.042-08:00Ana Castillo and Focus, Courage, AssertivenessWaking up to the good news that I will be working with<a href="http://www.anacastillo.com/content/"> Ana Castillo</a> in January!!! I'm just thrilled, and I keep thinking maybe we'll fall in love!<br />
<br />
Really, her book <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/So-Far-God-A-Novel/dp/0393326934">So Far from God</a></i> changed my life in undergrad at <a href="http://www.biola.edu/">Biola</a>. And in grad school, I've read and written about much more of her writing: <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Goddess-Americas-Ana-Castillo/dp/1573226300">Goddess of the America</a>s, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Massacre-Dreamers-Xicanisma-Ana-Castillo/dp/0452274249">Massacre of the Dream</a>ers, and T<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Mixquiahuala-Letters-Ana-Castillo/dp/0385420137">he Mixquiahuala Letter</a>s to mention a few.<br />
<br />
Altogether, this morning, I'm feeling inspired! This is great news in the midst of this "finals week"! And, as I dive back into editing Chapter 4 today, I'm ready.<br />
<br />
The soundtrack for such a day involves some India Arie, no??<br />
<br />
"I choose to be the best I that I can be,<br />
I choose to be authentic in everything I do....<br />
And everyday I have the opportunity to choose."<br />
<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/uXF-OKz6GzE" width="420"></iframe>dra cristinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00072718647522393994noreply@blogger.com0